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apologies in advance


Tony.T

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Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching Balamory on the telly when he hears a knock at the door. Upon opening it, he is confronted by a little Chinese man, clutching a clipboard and yelling, "You sign! You sign!"

Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts. Nelson is standing here bewildered, when the Chinese man starts to yell louder, "You sign! You sign!"

Nelson says to him, "Look mate, you've obviously got the wrong guy. Push off." And he shuts the door in his face.

The next day he is contentedly sorting through his collection of Pitcairn Island postage stamps when hears a knock at the door again. When he opens it, the little Chinese man is back with a huge truck of brake pads. He thrusts his clipboard under Nelson's nose, yelling, "You sign! You sign!"

Mandela is getting a bit hacked off by now, so he shoves the little Chinese man back, shouting, "Look, bugger off! You've got the wrong bloke! I don't want them!"

Then he slams the door in his face again.

The following day, late in the afternoon, Nelson is relaxing on his patio, enjoying a crab-paste sandwich and a can of Vimto when he hears a knock on the door again. On opening the door, there is the same little Chinese man thrusting a clipboard under his nose, shouting, "You sign! You sign!"

Behind him are two very large trucks full of car parts. This time Nelson loses his temper completely. He picks up the little man by his shirt front until their noses are almost touching, and yells in his face, "Look, I don't want these! Do you understand? You must have the wrong name! Who do you want to give these to?"

A look of puzzlement appears on the Chinese man's face. He consults his clipboard, and says, "You not Nissan Maindealer?"

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